Happily vulnerable. I lay here underneath the thick green blanket.  I lay here vulnerable to the elements. My true vulnerability was in my loving loyalty to you. The undying cling to your heart and head. The one vulnerability I do not detest but the one with the greatest capacit for hurt. Of all the terrible […]

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On the cusp

You’ve pushed me to my ends. So far that I no longer feel myself but a constantly changing depiction of what you need. You’ve hurt me in irreversible ways, cuts heal but leaves scars, ones that laden my eyes and my heart. There’s no escaping it, no escaping you. You lift me to my highest […]

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I have been told I should be grateful. Grateful for life. And I am. I’m grateful for the love I have felt, the happiness I have shared and the sadness I have encountered. I’m grateful for all of the human feelings that I have felt. I’m not grateful for the uncertainty. How, when and why […]

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That. Is. Not. Appropriate.

Appropriation is subjective for the most part. What’s not is an act which affects another person which you deem to be appropriate but they do not. Then there must be a mutual understanding of boundaries. The damage is done before someone tells you to stop. So THINK please, that’s something many of us forget to […]

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Flat would be good

It’s always up and down. Just now we are the lowest we have been but the up tricks is into another cycle. We don’t lack love let’s start with that. But I nip and I pick and it’s tit for tat. The bads are so bad but I have never doubted. I really wish he […]

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The World

The World feels so heavy as it burdens my lungs. Struggling to inhale I struggle to forget. The things of my past, of his past, of the possible future. The endless dimensions of what could/has/will/might be is too much for me to carry. I need to switch off, to not care, to save myself from […]

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How could you?

How could you leave me amongst my darkest days? To wallow and hate and forget my old ways. To cry and scream and want to explode. How could you leave me on the verge of implode?

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